Today Sean and I went straight to my house after school instead of itsagrind. Which isn’t a normal occurrence. At about 3:31 PM my 9 year old brother Jake walked in the house. He was panting and out of breath, meaning that he jogged at least half a block. We asked why and he said someone chased him. I had to inquire who and how old they were in case it were a pedophile, child murderer or religous fanatic that I don’t want to worry about coming in and killing and/or fondling Sean, my brother and I. Jake said his pursuer was about as tall as him, meaning it was another 9 year old or a midget. This was relieving as I’m fairly certain that Sean and I can take down either of these. Less than 15 minutes later a local youth that looked like a miniature Elijah Wood rang the door bell. I answered after making sure I had at least a foot and a half on them. He asked if Jake was home and said he saw him come into the house. I couldn’t lie to the young Elijah, he knew to much. I then went to my brother and asked why the child was at our door. My brother told me that it’s the kid that he walks home with. Also, that the tot is boring and that he didn’t want to walk with him so, he ran home instead of dealing with his colleague. I then asked if he wanted to go talked to him. He was on board to lock the door and have the hobbit-boy sit on the porch until he caught the hint. It was hard for me to not go along, because that’s hilarious. If he’s walking home with him, the kids parents probably live nearby, unless there is a secret portal to the shire on my street. I live in fear of conflict, so my brother was forced to talk to the bug-eyed boy who seemed a bit heart broken. We could hear my brother speaking un-apologetically to the lad. He then walked back in to watch the television.
My brother has done similar things many times, such as denying that he knew a group of kids that I’ve seen him playing with multiple times when they asked if he could play. My 9 year old brother hates kids. The only kid he plays with lives down the street and he kind of hates him.
I love my anti social brother and his goal to never have friends. It makes me happy watching a 9 year old essentially tell another 9 year old to fuck off.